Enjoying the view from her office balcony.

How to Live Single in a Married World

1st Corinthians 7:1-9

By Pastor Mike Sanders

Marriage is the norm in our society because of the marriages of our friends and the expectations of our families. For single people, who can feel as though they’re missing out on something crucial, this can be challenging.

But the truth is, there’s nothing wrong with being single. In fact, there are many benefits to being single. You have more freedom to do what you want when you want. You can travel, pursue your hobbies, and focus on your career without worrying about anyone else.

Of course, there are also challenges to being single. You might have occasional feelings of loneliness and be subjected to family and friend pressure to get married. But if you’re happy being single, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Here are a few tips for living single in a married world:

  • Know that God does not expect everyone to be married. Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.”  (1Co 7:1 ESV). Don’t succumb to cultural pressure; maintain a spiritual perspective.
  • Celebrate your singleness. Don’t be afraid to embrace your single status. Make a list of all the things about being single that you enjoy, and refer to it frequently.
  • Guard against the temptations of being single. “But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband” (1Co 7:2 ESV). Choose marriage if your desires are too strong. “But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion” (1Co 7:9 ESV). Avoid listening to, looking at, or being around anything that strengthens the temptations.
  • Build a strong, godly support network. Having a solid support network of friends and family can help you feel less lonely when you’re single. Make sure you have people you can talk to about your feelings and who guide you into the truth of Jesus Christ.
  • Redirect your focus. Get involved in your Church and community. Engaging in your community is one of the best ways to meet new people and develop friends. Volunteer for a cause you care about, join a club or bible study group or take a class from a bible college.
  • Commit yourself to purity (1st Cor. 7:3-5). Understand that being in an intimate relationship outside of marriage is unbiblical. Set aside your entire being for God.
  • Don’t compare yourself to others. When it comes to relationships, it’s tempting to compare yourself to other people. But remember, everyone is on their spiritual journey. Just because someone else is married doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong.
  • Seek after God’s plan for your life (1st Cor. 7:6-7) by recognizing His universal will for all people. Embrace His particular will just for you.
  • Be patient. If you’re looking for love, don’t give up. Finding the right person may take some time, but it’s worth it in the end.

In case you forgot, being single is not a negative thing. It’s a time to focus on serving others and growing your holiness. So, enjoy it!